It has long been known that... I haven't bothered to look up
the original reference
...of great theoretical and practical ...interesting to me
While it has not been possible to The experiments didn't work
provide definite answers to these out, but I figured I could at
questions. least get a publication out
The W-Pb system was chosen as The fellow in the next lab had
especially suitable to show the some already made up
High purity... Composition unknown except
Very high purity... for the exaggerated claims of
Extremely high purity... the supplier
A fiducial reference line... A scratch
Three of the samples were The results of the others
chosen for detailed study... didn't make sense and were
...handled with extreme care during ...not dropped on the floor
Typical results are shown... The best results are shown...
Although some detail has been lost It is impossible to tell from
in reproduction, it is clear from the the micrograph
original micrograph that...
Presumably at longer times... I didn't take the time to find
The agreement with the predicted fair
curve is excellent
...as good as could be expected non-existent
These results will be reported at I might get around to this
a later date sometime
The most reliable values are those He was a student of mine
It is suggested that...
It is believed that... I think...
It may be that...
It is generally believed that.... I have such a good objection
to this answer that I shall
now raise it.
It is clear that much additional I don't understand it
work will be required before a
Unfortunately, a quantitative theory Neither does anybody else
to account for these effects has not
Correct within an order of magnitude Wrong
It is to be hoped that this work This paper isn't very good but
will stimulate further work in the field neither are any of the others
on this miserable subject
Thanks are due to Joe Glotz for Glotz did the work and Doe
assistance with the experiments and explained what it meant.
to John Doe for valuable discussions.
Gabe Wiener Columbia University
Edited by Brad Templeton. MAIL, yes MAIL your jokes to funny@looking.UUCP
Attribute the joke's source if at all possible. I will reply, mailers willing.
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