From GAMES Magazine, AUG/SEPT 89:From the Murphy Center for the Codification of Human and Organizational Law ACW's Theorems of Practical Physics - The volume times the frequency of the neighboring dog's bark is inversely proportional to the intelligence of its owner. Alicia's Discovery - When you move something to a more logical place, you only can remember where it used to be and your decision to move it. Beck's Political Law - A good slogan beats a good solution. Boyle's Laws - 1) The first pull on the cord will always send the drapes the wrong way. 2) Anything sore will be bumped more often. Dillon's Rule - The Soup-de-Jour is always cream of broccoli. Dolan's Law - If a person has had any connection with Harvard University or the state of Texas, he will find a way to make that known to you during the first ten minutes of your first conversation. Ehre's Laws of Double Doors - In approaching an entrance that has two doors, you will: 1) always enter the locked side; 2) Always pushed when you should have pulled (or vice-versa); 3) Always, even when the door says to push or pull, do the opposite 90% of the time. Grissom's Law - The smallest hole will eventually empty the largest container, unless it is made intentionally for drainage, in which case it will clog. (Henry) Kissenger's Discovery - The nice thing about being a celebrity is that when you bore people, they think it's their fault. McGregor's Revised Maxim - The shortest distance between two points is under construction. Morgan's Discovery - The average man is a little below average. N-1 Law - If you need four screws for a job, the first three will be easy to find. Nineteenth Hole Observation - The older I get, the better I used to be. Payack's Update - One hologram is worth 1,000,000,000 words. Tillinger's Rule - Moderation in all things, including moderation. Zeek's Discovery - The key to flexibility is indecision. |