"World's Greatest Light Bulb Joke" from the column Back End by John C. Dvorakin DEC PROFESSIONAL:Q: How many DEC employees does it take to change a light bulb? A: 2 People - preliminary discussion on concept of change 1 Person - devise and write formal bulb architecture 2 People - feasibility study and timetable of events 2 People - produce four utilities to reduce screw-in time (in addition to the electric utility) 1 Person - maintain ISO and DEC standards (sockets, voltage, AC/DC) 4 People - commonality task force on bulb change 15 People - change bulb 5 People - perform bulb functional test 2 People - perform bulb load test 3 People - perform bulb regression test 1 Person - perform bulb performance analysis 1 Person - perform bulb bottleneck analysis 1 Person - follow-up study (bulb merge feasibility) 1 Person - interface with Utilities Commission 1 Person - interface with users. (Did they want incandescent when we only supply non-tunable flourescent point product?) BAX (Bulbs Are eXpensive)! 5 People - perform BOSE (Build Other Socket Enhancements) compatibility/architecture study. 3 People - ensure form (round/square, clear/frosted) follows function (wattage, 120/240 volts, visible/ultraviolet, flashing, flood/spot). 3 People - implement temporary alternative bulb socket for already(!?) existing, successful, and profitable socket (bulb-in-one). 5 People - determine how to market/package/distribute temporary alternative bulb socket. 10 People - determine how to perform bulb change product split (control: switches, dimmers; versus implementation: screw-in torque, recovery strategies) 1 Person - interface with utilities commission QA group 1 Person - submit to BDC (Bulb Distribution Center) 1 Person - set up BPR (Bulb Problem Reports) system 10 People - answer customer BPRs 11 People - football team to challenge bulb changers t up BPR (Bulb Problem Reports) system 10 People - answer customer BPRs 11 People - football team to challenge bulb c |